compassion

HOW TO KEEP YOURSELF HAPPY WITH ALL THE SORROWS AROUND US

June 8, 2007 · No Comments

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→ No CommentsCategories: books · business speakers · funny jokes · funny stories · great big belly laughs · how to seduce women · how to seduce women with humor · humor · jokes · keep yourself happy · laughter is the best medicine · learn to date · little snickers · medium sized chuckles · recommended by experts · secrets of attracting women · stand up comedy material · teaching people to be funny

SCOLIOSIS - CURVING OF THE SPINE

June 7, 2007 · No Comments

Although no one in my family has scoliosis, I went to attend this brief talk to understand more about scoliosis, because one of my student has it. My student is 13 years old.  It seems it runs in her family.  Heard from her mum that two daughters have it together with their dad.  That means, a total of three in the family of six have it.  So sad. 

Scoliosis is the curving of the spine.  Our spine has twenty four moveable bones, stacked in a column of bony blocks that sit on top of each other and separated by discs and joints. The bones are joined together with ligaments and muscles that run across the joints and discs.

The role of the spine is to support the body and provide it with mobility so that we can bend and twist in all directions and at the same time protect spinal cord and nerves that run through it.  Above all it has to last a lifetime!!

The spine is highly vulnerable and susceptible to trauma and other disorders like repetitive strain and poor posture.  As a result, the spine can become misligned and unstable and this may cause irritation of the spinal nerves, muscles, joints and ligaments leading to:

HEADACHES, MIGRAINES, NECK PAINS, SHOULDER PAINS, LOWER BACK PAINS.. . . .

It is therefore, essential for us to maintain our spine in good health and good condition.  Otherwise our delicate spine will start to crumble leading to degenerative changes like inflamed joints, bone spurs, ruptured discs,  …

It affects more girls than boys, partly due to hormones.  Most of them face this problem when they reach puberty period when there is sudden growth.  Doctors use the Adam test.

People with back problem can either go for surgery where they put metal rods inside the body to prevent the spine from curving, wear back braces that can be extremely uncomfortable due to sweat, itch, pain and painful blisters. Or go for collective manual therapy of safe spinal adjustments, muscle relaxation tehniques and safe corrective exercises; in some cases electrotherapy is used to get a complete treatment regime.  Some use the shaking of body method - to loosen the muscles and bones, putting or wearing weights on specific parts of the body to make the body balance just like an olden scale. Example, if the left side is bent to one side, put weights to the right side, something like this. This will also train the mind to focus.

If the person is too old, there is no way you can help much because the bones would have already fused together. 

→ No CommentsCategories: bone spurs · bones · curving · curving of spine · family · genes · girls · headaches · hormones · inflamed joints · joints · lifetime · lower back pains · migraines · muscles · neck pains · old · puberty · puberty period · ruptured discs · scoliosis · shoulder pains · sudden growth · young boys · young girls

MAN WITH A TUMOR REMOVED FROM HEAD, NOW BLIND

June 7, 2007 · 1 Comment

While on my way home from a introductory talk about SCOLIOSIS by a Chiropractor, I met in the public bus a 100% blind man (he lost his sight completely after his operation seven years ago).  He had boarded the bus a few stops after me.  Those people seated near the entrance quickly aided him to the vacant seat beside me.  He was a chirpy, not bad looking man and thanked us all for the kindness, that’s ROY.

I, being a busybody, or another word for kaypo, out of concern, asked him where he was alighting and if we could assist him in other ways.  Found out that he was living in Bedok South Block 6.  He told me he became blind after an operation in year 2000.  Then he flipped up his hair and i realised that he had a gaping hole on his skull.  Assuming our head is 100%, he now has only 80% or less.  From the side, it was rather like a right angle.  Rather scary for me, sitting beside him, seeing this for my first time in real life.  Oh ya, I had watched Guinness World of Records, the Negro man who had half his head partially blown off by a gun, and now the other half remained.  But never in my dreams to sit beside a man in my country who also almost has the same condition - part of the skull missing.  He told me it’s all soft there.  Hummmm. Actually I wanted to feel it or to take his picture but thought it would be too rude.

He said seven years before the operation, year 1993, he, while working as a dispatch driver met with a traffic accident, bike skidded and he suffered a cut near his right eye.  He was on medical leave for a few days.  Everything was fine, nothing happened after that and it was only in year 2000 that he started having headache, migraine, pain …. that he went for a check up.  Doctor told him that he had a small tumor above the same eye where the cut was.  He said he had to undergo the brain operation to remove a small tumor.  When he woke up after 2 months, he was told that it was the size of an egg.  It was non-magliment. He is still wondering what the doctor meant by small tumor. He had thought it was quite small but the size of an egg??? It was not small.  Maybe the doctor just didn’t want to frighten him or maybe it’s true, in the doctor’s eyes, this was small?? The doctor also didn’t tell him that he will be blind on both eyes after the operation otherwise Roy said he might not have gone for it.  After perfect or almost perfect eyesight to totally blindness is no joke and no fun. It was scary, very, very scary, he said.  And he bowed down and sighed.  He seems to be on the verge of crying, his eyes seemed red, but there were too many people in the bus.

From what I make out is that he didn’t really have a smooth operation or post-operation.  There was some infection and he was in a coma like condition for two months.  Roy didn’t have any feelings or emotions, etc, as he laid there on the hospital bed, he just occasionally opened his eyes, couldn’t talk or remember anything. (I did wonder if the coma was induced by his Doctors or was it a natural thing after brain surgery. But so long, two months??)  His mum told him that he was fed through a tube. Only near the last part of the two month, was he spoon fed.  I didn’t and couldn’t probe too much in the bus.  He would be wondering why I am asking him so many questions.  I managed to speak to him for about 20 minutes.  Roy is staying with his mother and he is now a Masseur. He massages people’s feet and shoulders, not the body.  He started massaging only about 3 years ago.  He does not have a basic salary, his pay is based on commissions.  If he has no clients, that means, no pay.  He earns about US$460 to US$530 per month.    Told me he has aching shoulders after all the massages.  I just kept quiet.  What can I say?? Can’t ask him to change jobs, can I?? But I did tell him that he has a good voice, can be a telephonist or telephone marketeer.  Queried him about the cost of his operation, it cost about US$16,000 C class (subsidised a lot). The family had to pay the money from their own pockets because they couldn’t claim insurance as he didn’t have money to renew his insurance that caused it to lapsed.  Sighed again.

From our conversation, can tell that he is still depressed about his blindness.  Just to comfort him, I had to tell him I understood his feelings.  But i told him there are many more people who are worst off than him.  There are definitely some people who have had undergone brain surgery that have left them either totally vegetable, or left them with minds still aware of everything but are paralysed, or half paralysed, etc.  I said at least his limbs are all working properly, it’s only his sight and the missing part of the skull.  I told him GOD LOVES HIM. I said if compared with other more unfortunate, he is considered fortunate already. I also told him my own daughter has fits, thus I know how he felt.

He said he was given a fake skull to cover up his hole but it was too uncomfortable, thus he preferred to go without his skull protection.

Because of him, I again wondered, what happens if he falls ill?  It’s definitely not good to be poor.  He doesn’t have much education like me, but probably worst, maybe primary or lower secondary only.  He can’t see, look a bit different compared with us because of his missing skull on right side, near temple.  

LIFE….          UNPREDICTABLE ….          FORTUNE OR MISFORTUNE????      BETTER TO BE ALIVE OR DEAD???

Getting late, tomorrow i will blog about what the Chirpractor said about scoliosis, very briefly.

Please donate by Telegraphic Transfer to my accounts by reading my earlier blogs on where to donate. Thanks .

NOVALIS SHAPED BEAM SURGERY

Anyway there is this advanced radiation machine that can destroy brain tumours that previously could not be removed using surgery or existing radiation machines.  This new system is called NOVALIS SHAPED BEAM SURGERY.  It is better than the gamma knife. Like the new system, the gamma knife involves radiosurgery - using radiation to burn off cancerous growths. But for some whose tumours were too large or located at the lowest part of the head, even the gamma knife could not help.  The gamma knife involves firing burst of radiation from a few points on the top of a metal helmet which the patient wears over his head while lying down.  The rays are angled in such a way that they converge at the spot where the tumour is too low, such as at the top of the spinal cord, the rays cannot reach it. 

With the new system, developed by German medical technology company BrainLAB, radioation is emitted from a J-shaped machine, which can revolve in a complete circle around the patient’s head or any part of his body while he is lying down on an adjustable table.

Radiosurgery can now be done for inaccessible tumours in the lower part of the head,spine and even other parts of the body. This new machine also allows for a lower dose of radiation to be given over a few sessions, rather than all at once. This reduces the risk of side effects such as nausea and even sight loss. (read my above posting on Roy.) May God bless these wonderful scientist and doctors for their advancement in technology!!! How many people are left more intact, perfect.

For example, 40% of patients with an ear tumour would lose their hearing after gamma knife treatment, but just 8% do so after being beamed by the new system.  The machine can also cauterise (burn/burn with hot iron) tumours up to 10 cm wide, much bigger than the 3cm wide growths the gamma knife can treat.  Some people who have heart problems can have this option and have this non-invasive treatment and need not have to stay in hospital.

Charges for radiosurgery using the new system are about the same as that of the gamma knife.

→ 1 CommentCategories: BrainLAB · GOD LOVES · German · Germany · God · Novalis · Novalis Shaped Beam Surgery · anger · chiropractor · chirpy · depressed · depressed about blindness · fate · fits · fortune · fortune or misfortune · gamma knife · heart patient Novalis · insurance · life · massage · medical · misfortune · money · mother · muscles · no money · no pay · novalis beam shaper · operation · poor · radiation · scoliosis · shoulders · subsidised · subsidy · surgery · telephonist · tumor · unpredictable · vegetable

SITES WORTH LOOKING INTO

June 6, 2007 · No Comments

Putting some sites which I find interesting.


A Complete Resource Guide For Parents Who Have Children Diagnosed With Aspergers Syndrome.
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→ No CommentsCategories: allergic · anti-aging · anti-cancer treatment · aspenger · astral projection · autism · bad breath · beat cancer · books · cancer · children with aspenger syndrome · children with autism · download · effective technique · ejeculation · exzema cure · games downloads · getting rid of bad breath · getting rid of moles · great big belly laughs · moles · movie downloads · movies · mp3 · muscle relaxation · music · music downloads · nice body shape

AUTISM - WHAT IS IT ABOUT, HOW TO DEAL WITH IT?

June 6, 2007 · No Comments

AUTISM Autism is a puzzling disorder because it is difficult to understand the behaviors of autistic people and because the world is as confusing for them as it is to us. Thus we have to learn to live with one another because it seems to be becoming more common among us.Autism affects more boys than girls. Ratio 4:1

There are Five Pervasive Developmental Disorders (PDDs)

Childhood Disintegrative Disorder (CDD)

Rett’s Disorder (RD)

 Autistic Disorder (AD)

Pervasive Developmental Disorder - Not Otherwise Specified (PDD-NOS)

Asperger’s Syndrome (AS) - high functioning autism

Although the word “autism” was first used publicly by the Swiss psychiatrist Eugen Bleuler around year 1911, criteria for the syndrome did not exist until Leo Kanner laid them down around 1943. Autism appears to have existed throughout recorded history. It occurs in all ethnic and social groups. Knowledge of autism has improved greatly over the years in some countries, although there is no known cure. It means “SELF”.

It is still not known what causes autism but recent research, is pointing increasingly in the direction of its being a difference in brain structure, especially in the amygdale, from what is considered normal. Genes might also be involved. Brain abnormalities may result from genetic (hereditary) or environmental (e.g., exposure to toxins) factors, metabolic disorders (e.g., serotonin deficiency), viral infections (e.g., German measles), or complications during pregnancy and delivery.

It is definitely not caused by poor parenting as was once believed.

Autism is effectively a developmental disability. An autistic person will have significant difficulties in several areas of his/her development. The areas most affected are communication, social interaction and behavior. This developmental disability may have a particular pattern called autism, or there may be varying amounts of disability in other areas of development which result in patterns called Asperger’s syndrome or Pervasive Developmental Disorder - Not Otherwise Specified (PDD - NOS). This whole area of autistic developmental disabilities is referred to as “autism spectrum disorders”. People with these disorders are affected differently, but all require specialized assistance and support.The best way to help a person with an autistic disorder is to understand how the following three areas of difficulty affect their view of the world.

· COMMUNICATON: Autism affects the ability of a person to understand the meaning and purpose of body language and the spoken and written word. Words can be misunderstood, interpreted literally or not understood at all. Other people’s feelings and emotions can also be difficult to understand.

· SOCIAL INTERACTION: Social interaction is an essential part of life for most people. For autistic people, being sociable is difficult, scary and very confusing. Some appear to withdraw and become isolated; others try very hard to be sociable but never seem to get it right. People with autism can find friendships difficult.

· BEHAVIOUR: Impairments in Communication and Social Interaction produce a range of behaviors that have become linked with autism spectrum disorders. These may include:Some early infant behaviors can clue parents in to potential problems before a formal test or a pediatrician (child doctor) visit might. Please note that seeing any or several of these does not necessarily indicate autism, but once you detect a pattern of the behaviors below to consult a developmental specialist.

Around 6 months to 12 months:

- Not babbling much

- Not making eye contact with parents during interaction - Not smiling when parents smile (parents shouldn’t have to touch the baby to elicit a smile)

- Not participating in vocal turn-taking (where the baby makes a sound, you imitate child; child then makes the sound again, and so on.)

- Not responding to peek-a-boo on a regular basis

Around 6 months to 36 months:

- Speech - absent, delayed or showing abnormal patterns, no attempts to speak

- Cannot feel pain, no emotions to pain, high trash-hold of pain

- No pointing, waving or grasping - No response when called by name; indifference to others

- Obsessions -intensive interest with favorite topics, objects, places, people or activities.

- Insistence on sameness - routines bring some order to the autistic person’s confusion - a change of routine can be very difficult to cope with.

- Repetitive Body movements - such as rocking, hand-flapping, tip toeing

- Behavior that may cause self injury (such as hand biting). head-banging, hand-biting, wrist-biting and excessive self-rubbing and scratching. Behaviors often associated with seizure activity include: headbanging, slapping ears and/or head, hand-biting, chin hitting, scratching face or arms, and, in some cases, knee-to-face contact

- Fixations on a single object or clothes. For clothing, child might insist on wearing the same clothes the whole day, the whole week, the whole month, etc.

- A strong resistance to changes in routine. They might get upset if the gate is not closed properly, the chair is off by one centimeter off normal position, your shirt is not buttoned, your dress is not pressed, etc.

- Sensory sensitivities - to certain sounds, colors, tastes, smells, textures. - Oversensitivity to certain textures, smells or sounds - Loss of any language skills - Play - isolated, repetitive, unimaginative, destructive, obsess in stacking things up, lining things like a train, spinning things, using anything like drums

- Tantrums - can be a way of expressing extreme confusion and/or frustration, screaming, banging head or other types of self mutilation / destruction, jumping - Problems sleeping, likes dark places

- Don’t like noise or certain sounds

Autism Treatments

There is no cure for autism, and there is as yet no standard of care. But while scientists search for biological and environmental factors that may predispose a person to the disorder, a few treatments have made a difference for some children.

Behavioral therapy

One of the most widely used programs is Applied Behavior Analysis, which focuses on reducing specific problem behavior such as aggression and self-injury while also teaching new skills and showing children diagnosed with autism how to handle changes in their environment. (Another reason why an individual may engage in head banging is to reduce pain such as pain from a middle ear infection or a migraine headache (de Lissovoy, 1963; Gualtieri, 1989). There is growing evidence that pain associated with gastrointestinal problems, such as acid reflux and gas, may be associated with self-injury. In addition, some autistic individuals report that certain sounds, such as a baby crying or a vacuum cleaner, can cause pain. In all of these instances, self-injury may release beta-endorphins which would dampen the pain.)

The Picture Exchange Communication System (PECS) - The exchange of a picture to communicate

This system was developed to help people with autism and developmental disabilities who are nonverbal or have limited verbal communication. PECS may also be used in conjunction with a voice output communication device. The Picture Exchange Communication System (PECS) when introduced and practiced rigorously is proving very useful to develop communication, particularly in children with autistic spectrum disorders. The basis of the whole thing is that when a child reaches for something they really, really want, something they love, then the thing they love in picture or photo is introduced in between the child and their “reached-for” desired object or activity. When the child then gives the adult the picture, the adult immediately gives them the thing (or activity) they want. This exchange can take place very quickly, when children are not physically disabled. The process works up from very simple requests to use of complex sentences (in pictures and/or words) but is always based on the exchange principle. The exchange process is a lot easier to describe than to do correctly! The PECS system is a behaviorist - using rewards to reinforce desired behaviors, aim of errorless learning, formal techniques for extinguishing errors, etc - and hightly structured.  Each step in the instructional process is broken down into about 6 highly detailed stages.  As well as being a behaviorist instructional approach, PECS is also a specialized form of augmentative & alternative communication AAC. Functional communication is emphasized and prioritized, rather than ‘language’ or curricular targets. There are no prerequisites to entry to this method of communication instruction (e.g. picture recognition and symbolic understanding are not required before the start - they are expected to develop throughout the process). All modes of communication are accepted, speech attempts must not be insisted upon (but improved oral speech often occurs, with PECS).  PECS is often used alongside the TEACCH approach; it is not an ‘either/or’ scenario.

Medication

Medication is often used to deal with a specific behavior, like self-injurious tendencies or aggression. Reducing such behavior may allow the person with autism to focus on other things, like learning. Doctors have had success prescribing drugs typically used for obsessive-compulsive disorder, schizophrenia and attention-deficit hyperactivity disorder. (Naltrexone and naloxone)

Occupational therapy

This kind of treatment helps children develop daily living skills, fine and gross motor development, and sensory integration.

Praises, Encouraging comments

Try to praise, encourage the child instead of showing face of disbelieve when child takes the wrong item or say the wrong thing. Use positive words to encourage confidence in timid child! Praises should come in different forms: example, “good job, well done, excellent, you are so smart, I like that, genius, so brainy”, etc. Encouragement can also come as a physical tap on body parts, example, tap the child on the shoulder, on the head, on the hand, etc. You can also use food or toy rewards to motivate the child. Remember to use the things that the child likes very much, (if appropriate). Try to change the reward so that the child doesn’t get sick of it.

Speech therapy

This can help some people with autism overcome communication and language barriers.

Special diets

There is growing interest in the link between autism and gastrointestinal (GI) ailments. Eliminating certain foods from the diet can help some children. Easing the pain and discomfort of food sensitivities that many autistic kids have can free them up to focus on other things. Starting child on a restricted diet, such as a gluten/casein-free diet, or removing specific foods to which their child showed signs of an allergic reaction. (People with autism are often intolerant of gluten, a protein in four types of cereal, and casein, a protein found in animals’ milk.) Gluten and gluten-like proteins are found in wheat and other grains, including oats, rye, barley, Turkish’s bulgur, durum, Egypt’s kamut and spelt, and foods made from those grains. They are also found in food starches, semolina, couscous, malt, some vinegars, soy sauce, flavorings, artificial colors and hydrolyzed vegetable proteins. Casein is a protein found in milk and products containing milk, such as cheese, butter, yogurt, ice cream, whey and even some brands of margarine. It also may be added to non-milk products such as soy cheese and hot dogs in the form of caseinate.

Sound therapy

Classical music, sound of the sea waves, sound of water, chants, soothing music have been shown to encourage improvement in the way the brain processes input for some kids with an autism spectrum disorder.

Educational programs

These vary widely, but are most effective when tailored to the needs of the individual. Most are aimed at helping children overcome problem behaviors.

CONCLUSION Autistic adolescents and adults are people you might encounter every day but not know it. There are many things you might think about them, but often they are not true. Some of them may appear selfish, self-absorbed, crazy or egotistical because autistic people do not respond adequately when someone says something, or because autistic people talk on and on about one subject with little regard to the rest of the conversation. Some of them might appear like loners, or eccentric loners. Some of them might appear as the opposite, people who try hard to be social but don’t know how. Autistic people come from all different backgrounds, and have all different appearances. There are the high-functioning, low-functioning, anything in between, and any combination of functioning levels. Different people might classify autistics as different functioning levels depending on when and where they see them. Some of them wouldn’t appear different at all until you got to know them. They may have been lower-functioning, or higher-functioning, or the same level of functioning, as children. Their skills might fluctuate dramatically. They present their autism in as many ways as there are autistic people, and have as many opinions about it. They may have high-paying jobs, or low-paying jobs, or no jobs at all. The thing they all have in common is that they are autistic. They may not always appear like the child that so many people have heard of, who rocks and bangs his head on the wall and does not make eye contact and is completely mute and will never speak and lives in an institution. They may not appear like the “Rainman” savant who does complex calculations in his head but is otherwise autistic. They may not be Einstein or the Silicon Valley computer programmer stereotype. They may look like these things sometimes but not others. But they are autistic. They share some of the same difficulties and the same advantages in being autistic. They have differences, yes — everyone does — but they do have that in common. The next time you think of autistic children, remember that children grow up. The next time you think of someone who you get furious with because they just “don’t get” something simple even though they can do some things that are complicated, remember them. The next time you see someone walking down the street flapping their hands in front of their face and making odd noises, remember them. They may not be autistic, but you never know. Autistic children grow up, into autistic adolescents and autistic adults. They do not appear always the same as autistic children, though they may have a lot in common with them that may or may not be visible to someone unfamiliar with autism.

We should learn to be more compassionate to them and their families, rather than just stare at them or criticize them for being being brought up badly, because they are not!! Every parent would want the best for their children, but because we do not know much about them, we are not able to help them much. REMEMBER, THEY DON’T WANT TO BE BORN THIS WAY.

Now you understand why I am asking for donations in my first blog? Am I asking for too much??? If everyone here that reads my blog and donates to these people, you will be helping many of the unfortunate.  THANK YOU. IF YOU WANT TO DONATE TO ME, PLEASE CREDIT THROUGH TELEGRAPHIC TRANSFER:

M/s NG TSUI GEK

UNITED OVERSEAS BANK LTD - SINGAPORE

401-115-972-3

IF YOU WANT TO DONATE TO THE FINANCIALLY POOR CHILDREN, POOR ADULTS OR THE UNDERPRIVILEGED, PLEASE CREDIT THROUGH TELEGRAPHIC TRANSFER TO:

Goh Shi Da

MALAYAN BANKING BERHAD - SINGAPORE

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THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR YOUR KINDNESS READING AND UNDERSTANDING MY PLIGHT. REGARDLESS WHETHER YOU DONATE OR NOT, MAY GOD BLESS YOU ALL. 

→ No CommentsCategories: PECS · allergic · anger · autism · behaviors · biting · boys · casein-free diet · children · donation · girls · glutten · hitting · jobs · money · music · please help · poor · sub-normal · telegraphic transfer · underprivilege

Death of my young student on 2nd June 2007

June 6, 2007 · No Comments

4th June 2007 - A CHILD DIED ON 2ND JUNE

One of my student just died on the 2nd June 2007 on a Saturday. He is only 11 years old. When I received a phone call from his father about his son’s demise, I was close to tears. His father’s voice was trembling when he told me. It was only about one hour after his death.I couldn’t sleep for two days. I was troubled. On one hand, I was wondering, why must a child die so young (he is not even 12 years old), on the other hand, I was relieved. Relieved that this child who is so low functioning is now gone from this world…. Relieved that the family can go on …. He was born normal, a beautiful child, could speak, laugh, joked, was the clown in the family, so I heard from his mum when I visited them at home after the Muslim funeral. When he was born, he had jaundice, so stayed in hospital for a few days, after that, on off he would have high fever and also landed in hospital. He would come out fine all the time. But one day, he had high fever and also had a fall, after that, he couldn’t talk. He also started having fits. Doctor to this day, said it’s called “Adult Fits”. Probably a term to say that he will have fits throughout his life. When his father heard that his son will become sub-normal, the family cried for a long time. I can understand how they must have felt then. It’s like those unfortunate people who have cancer or any type of terminal disease.My own daughter started having fits when she reached puberty period, as a mum, I also worry for her, for her future, her career, etc. Fits is so unpredictable. The person just collapse like that, any time, anywhere. I had asked myself, what have I done to deserve this, God, why …..????

According to my student’s father, child was sleeping at around 7 plus in the evening, the father who was in the room, saw him moving. Then at around 8pm, the father went into the bedroom and checked on son again. This time, he saw son lying on his stomach and father turned him over, child was already bluish on face. The bluish part was normal, because deceased was like this when he had his fits. But this time, his eyes didn’t flutter as usual. Body was still warm, legs were a little cold. Father sensed something wrong and quickly performed chest compression (CPR) on son. Meanwhile they also called for the ambulance. Ambulance came very fast and the ambulance people also did the chest compression thing, the father put his finger near nose to feel for breath, but there was none. The medics quickly sent him to the nearest hospital about 5 to 10 mins away. In the hospital, father was told he is already dead but they will still try to resuscitate him for another 15 minutes. Alas, he cannot be saved. Father was told that hospital might need to conduct an autopsy on him for the cause of death because he did not die of old age, but, if family could produce medicine or whatever medical reports, then an autopsy would not be done. Thankfully his child didn’t have to go through the cutting up. Being Muslims, they need to bury the body as soon as possible during the day and if an autopsy was done, it’s not too good.

Father told me, few days before son’s death, deceased son had done some pretty strange things. Son wanted to be carried, by putting his hands up(child couldn’t talk). Child also did this putting hands up gesture to other siblings in the family. Thankfully, all the family members carried him. He also kept asking for more food which was not normal.
Father also said it’s fated. When deceased had fits, he would let out a scream, either one of the family members would then monitor him. Normally the family would hear his scream because the house they are staying is small. (When in school, it’s the same, we will know child is having fits because he would scream.) But on that fateful day, there was a Malay wedding nearby, thus there was a lot of music. It probably drowned his scream, thus nobody came. IT’S JUST FATE.I gave them $200 from my own pocket to tide over cause this family is really poor. Although I am not rich myself (anyway, how long can I last with my low income donating??), I feel that they needed the money to pay for the ambulance, hospital bills, funeral, drinks, prayers, burial site, etc. This family is on subsidy now. Earlier, they were better off, had more children, .. until the recession came, lost one night job, the other day job slashed his pay, education too low, too old…… Mum couldn’t work full time because had to look after five children. They don’t even have a proper sofa set or a living room table. The sofa set they had had a lot of cracks on the fake leather. When I was there, saw the four other siblings sharing a small packet of Jack & Jill potato chips with gee. How many of you must share food???
Now you understand why I ask for donations in my first blog??
Am I asking too much.??? If everyone here that reads my blog

and donates to them, you will be helping many people.

→ No CommentsCategories: God · autopsy · burial site · compassion · death · donation · education · fate · financial · fits · funeral · high fever · kindness · lost job · malay · many children · medical · poor · prayers · recession · scream · sharing · strange things · subsidy

compassion = sorrow & No Money??

June 6, 2007 · 1 Comment

Thank you  WordPress.com. for giving me a site to get help.

To all the good people out there, this is my first time blogging out of stress and out of helplessness, SO HELP ME PLEASE!!!

Sigh! Another day gone. Why is my life like this?I come from an average family. Not extremely rich by definitely not very poor. Didn’t know why but when I was in school, I didn’t concentrate when teachers were teaching. When i reached 30, only then I know that studying is really easy. But it was only when i passed 40 that i realized that having a degree makes a lot of difference to my life and happiness.Why do I feel so?It started off like this: Four and a half years ago, I had a same reoccurring dream 3 times in 6 months. I dreamt of a special school for the disabled. The name of the school kept appearing in my dreams. Upon waking up, seldom in my dreams do i remember the details so clearly, but for this dream, i could see the School’s name so clearly. After 9 months had passed, I decided to give this place a try and worked as a DAILY RATED relief teacher. Too bad, my then well paying full time job required me to work only for them solely, thus I had to choose one. I then choose to work with the disabled…. Thinking back, I do sometimes wonder if I had made the right decision. Why did I leave a good branded company who has bosses who looked at staff’s performances, work attitude, personality …. rather than paper qualifications? Salaries there were based on performances, never qualifications!!! It’s definitely good to have qualifications but doesn’t mean that “all As certificate person” can be a good worker.

Life in the school is not all beautiful.

Although I appreciate and count my own blessings now, I do sometimes feel sad, traumatised, hopeless and helpless there, partly because :
1) of the poor children in the school,
2) a few teachers who think they know everything, who like to put words into my mouth, treated my like a slave, bad-mouthing me to others. Always assuming, asking me to do risky jobs although i won’t be paid when i get injured, asking me not to hold certain children when these children are runners. (probably want me to get into trouble with authorities, parents, school, etc)
3) and my only daughter who started to have epilepsy at the age of 14 (puberty period). It’s around the time of my repeating dreams.
4) low gross income with a lot of work after office hours - all these suggested by that particular new senior teacher. I didn’t need to do these before she came. Hope she will get her retribution one day.

I feel traumatised cause, as a LOWLY EDUCATED relief teacher, teachers with DEGREES or who have worked much longer always feel more superior than us. Its such, big fish eat small fish world. I may have a wealth of experience elsewhere but when I joined this school, i become a junior.

POOR CHILDREN
What made it worst was that I get to hear sad stories behind each child. Most of these disabled children come from poor or broken families. Their parents normally split/divorce because they are not able to take the pressure of having a less than normal kid. Our school caters to those with more severe disabilities, some have problems walking, some have multiple problems, autistic, fragile x, Williams syndrome, cleft, epilepsy, tics, downs syndrome, cerebral palsy, degeneration of everything, global delay or mental retardation. Some of the parents can have only one child, maybe because of their age or other reason, and their only one child has to be here in this school. It’s heart wrenching! If I am the parent, i might not have the strength to go on in life. Who will take care of me when I am old, who will take care of the child when the parents have gone?

NICE TEACHERS
Life might not be so bad if I get great teachers working as a group to help improve the lives of these children: to teach them, … to love them. YES, there are some nice real teachers and seniors, really beautiful inside and outside, fair, honest and not bias, listening to all, students, co-teachers, colleagues. There are a few who are so so generous by spending a lot of their own personal money on these children. Unfortunately some of the good and talented have left or are leaving.  But there is are a few out to bad mouth me. I wonder is it my birth number that is causing all these. My birth number is 27.

LOW GROSS YEARLY INCOME
In school, I do what a full time teacher does, the only things that I don’t need to do are goals and CCA. Being a daily rated person, I thought I only needed to work according to the hours accordingly to my contract. But for me, I need to do IEP during school holidays, lesson plans on week days, customised materials during my free time for individual students. Not that i mind, but i don’t feel the appreciation from the school. It’s like a must. But checking with other schools, the full time teachers do it, the daily rated worker just apply the steps or lesson plan! I wonder, who is the slave driver???? Some teachers with degree just need to look after three to four students for 4.5 hours and they are paid about US$20,000+ in a year with 3 months holiday (literally work 200 days for 4.5 hours)!! I work the same 200 days for 4.5 hours at US$5,000.

HORRIBLE TEACHERS
You are probably wondering why there are some teachers bad mouthing me? Well it wasn’t so when this new Senior Teacher came. She was from another special school. In the beginning, my life with her was OK. She being new, she wanted to impress the bosses. She wanted to change the world, etc. I think it’s alright, right? Three of us were in charge of the more special students, the more difficult ones, those who can’t talk. When she found out that the students were not that easy, she started using the non-humane method. She started to use rubber bands to snap at the children’s sensitive chin/neck area. She would herself or ask another teacher to hold the hands of certain autistic children near their wrist when they were difficult, you can see the children’s hands turning purplish due to lack of blood circulation. I wonder, does the child know what he did wrong to warrant the punishment? Can you imagine the fear in the child? Using bitter nail biting medicine to paint the children’s mouths. Not applying on one child alone but quite a few, at least four of them had it applied on their mouths and hands. No big deal, right? Oh, to let you know, the brush is not washed or sterilized after applying. Still no big deal, right?. Just for info, one of these children will eat his own stool or other people’s stool when there’s a chance. Does Hepatitis A, B, C spread this way or other transmittal diseases : AIDS, stomach ulcers and human parasitical worms? On the wound, there would be some blood or some blood on the teeth. One day, when a mother called up to enquire why her child vomited and when this senior teacher covered her own butt did I realise that it’s time for me not to do as instructed after bottling up for so long about cruelty. I told her I don’t want to do those things and that was when life for me changed. HELL started for me. . . . . .

When I doing my work in class, she would say that “It looks like you are not teaching this child…, you shouldn’t be doing this…” over and over again. She would begin to slave me, “Do this” “Do that” “Collect this” “Collect that” “Put this back.” etc. I was made to do her unimportant work. What about my own students’ IEP to complete? How am I be able to complete them? What frustrates me is that, by accusing me of not teaching a particular child and showing more attention to another hurts me. My Principal saw me making huge improvement in a severely autistic boy and praised me. What she saw is not the truth. How do you feel if someone accused you of doing something that you didn’t do, not once but many times?. Why must she “close her eyes intentionally” when I made an improvement in the serverely autistic student academically. You just can’t work non-stop with some students,  especially those severely autistic, they can only work for a very short time only. Too bad that she had to look at me only at the wrong time….. when I am concentrating on the other student. She would tell me not to hold a particuliar boy, but is she trying to get me into trouble?? The father of boy has told me that he will run off when he is not held. Is she trying to get me into trouble??? I was so afraid that I went on urgent leave on the day of travelling. WHY?? She is my senior, if I go against her, she will report to say I am not co-operative, and if I listen to her, boy will run off.  

What about herself? Why must be behave this way? When the boss says he is visiting our classroom, suddenly she will take out so much materials or work sheets for the children to do. Otherwise, her few students would be playing with the usual things, such as play dough, same old work sheet, rubber ball, etc. Both co-teachers are scatter brains, leaving this here, leaving that there, leave IEP inside the public transport bus, leave chair, materials, books, . . . elsewhere in another classroom without taking back, asking back for things that they didn’t loan, blah. blah. blah.. They will so suck up to the bosses and the more influential people. They will show that they are some damsel in distress, damsel trying to help but others not co-operative, …. They can always be seen in the Principal’s office laughing, letting out their grievances, …. and the principal is so easily influenced. HA HA. She would badmouth me that I am not co-operative, argumentative, not working or lazy, . . . . Would ‘junior’ teachers or senior teachers listen and believe her who is a permanent senior teacher or would they bother to side the defenseless daily rated relief teacher????? Have you guys been in my situation before. Should I be stressed???

Why do they like to pick on me? Is it because I am the most junior or is it because I have seen certain secrets that the new Senior Teacher inflicted on her students to impress the bosses. I have the most PECS (picture exchange cards) available, in colour and/or black and white. I collected them through these years. My collection is much more than all the teachers combined! I don’t think I am lousy cause I am always early to school, makes materials at home, specially bought a computer and laminating machine to prepare IEPs, worksheet, materials, go round places taking necessary photographs for teaching, collecting pictures from newspapers, magazines to make PECS for children with autism and those who can’t talk, art uses, etc.
But I came to realise the power of disagreeing with unfair people who cannot take “NO” or reasoning for their answers. You all reading, might know or understand what I mean.

TAKE NOTE, I AM ONLY EARNING GROSS TAKE HOME PAY OF LESS THAN US$5,000 IN A YEAR, NOT IN A MONTH!!!! I TAKE IT THAT I AM DOING CHARITY WORK FOR THE UNDERPRIVILEGED!!!

LITTLE MONEY
But I am not a quitter. I don’t give up so easily.
Money was not really an issue then, but now it is! Honestly, if not for the dreams and that my aged parents are also involved in helping the unfortunate children full time at home, (they still are - unpaid now cause the children are above 18 years of age), I would not have joined this place. I am bitter now cause I feel I am here to help these children in their life financially a little, giving them some sincere love and to learn to count my own blessings. Now it’s too late to join back my previous line. Who would want to employ a person as a Manager with such low education now? Again I stress, I am not saying that all those with degrees are tyrants and dictators, but working here is considered my life’s worst working experiences. My previous bosses and colleagues who were grads were not scheming at all. We had one goal, .. to improve the profits of the company and we all worked happily as a team. Now everything is so expensive. I really love to help the underprivileged but yet I also need help myself. By working here helping these unfortunate children, I am also doing a disservice to my own flesh and blood children. My children personally will not be able to inherit money from me when I die.BUT NOW, WITH US$16,000 GROSS TOTAL IN FOUR YEARS, (WORST OFF THEN THOSE ON SOCIAL WELFARE BUT WORKING) ,WOULD ANY KIND SOUL LIKE TO DONATE TO HELP ME PERSONALLY. I HOPE THAT THE VERY VERY RICH WILL BE KIND ENOUGH TO DONATE TO ME TO HELP ME BUY A PROPER HOUSE(PROPERTY). IF I HAD CONTINUED WORKING IN MY PREVIOUS COMPANY, I WILL BE ABLE TO DO SO BUT NOT ANYMORE.
FOR THOSE WHO EARN LESS, PLEASE DO NOT DONATE, CAUSE YOU WILL NEED THE MONEY YOURSELF AND YOUR FAMILY.

IF YOU WANT TO DONATE TO ME, PLEASE CREDIT THROUGH TELEGRAPHIC TRANSFER:  M/s NG TSUI GEK
UNITED OVERSEAS BANK LTD - SINGAPORE
401-115-972-3

IF YOU WANT TO DONATE TO THE FINANCIALLY POOR CHILDREN, POOR ADULTS OR THE UNDERPRIVILEGED, PLEASE CREDIT THROUGH TELEGRAPHIC TRANSFER TO: